Guidelines for choosing what movie to go see

“You sunk my battleship!” = “OK, let’s MOVIE this.”

 

If you’re like me, you get disappointed by the movies that you see in theatres. The tactics used to promote the movie often do not reflect the actual quality of the movie. If anything, when the advertising for a movie especially overstates the level of entertainment actually derived from said movie, it ends up backfiring and makes me rate the movie lower than if I had gone in with more realistic expectations.

Therefore, here are some helpful guidelines for choosing what movies to watch. They work for me, maybe they will work for someone who is not me.

Go see a movie only based on:

  • actual movie clips
  • The movie poster is also an acceptable factor in your decision.

Do not go see a movie based on:

  • The names of the actors/actresses
  • The names of the directors/producers/writers
  • Movie critic opinions
  • Friends and relatives and coworkers opinions
  • Random strangers opinions
  • Awards the movie won
  • Amazingly badass voiceovers

Good movies will be advertised primarily using the first category. Movies you will not want to see will rely mostly on the second. Good movies will have numerous quality clips, which is what we go to the theaters to see, and likewise, lesser movies will have a lot less. Movie studios don’t want to give away the best parts of the movie in the commercials, obviously, but if there are more to go around, they will divulge some if it means better advertising.

This movie opened as the #1 movie at the box office that weekend. A part of me dies inside whenever that happens.

 

I do not blame the people whose job it is to advertise lame movies. That also does not mean you need to fall for their tricks.

These are my guidelines for choosing which movies to see. Use them well.

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